DIXIE SAYS: Well that was certainly uninspiring. Tonight’s “Songs of Inspiration” performances were worthy of a really bad telethon held in your local mall. Jason and Kristy were the best in show- that’s how bad the night was. I say we give hopelessness and despair their own special night and see how that goes.
After all those cheesy group sings and dance numbers, “our idols” apparently can’t figure out how to get into a line. What a fitting beginning for what might possibly be the worst AI episode to date.
Michael Johns “Dream On”
“Pitch problems” was a charitable remark; the Chihuahua attack comment was probably more accurate. Not to mention the fact that this Aerosmith song wasn’t exactly a rousing song choice. Isn’t it more about how time has already passed us by so our only option at this point is to sit around dreaming? How motivating! A song such as “Higher Love” by Steve Winwood would have allowed Michael to showcase the bluesy notes in his voice and possibly stir up some emotion in the listeners. I’m still a fan and will chalk this up to ‘too much time spent on Idol Gives Back preparations and not enough time spent on song selection and practice.”
Syesha Mercado “I Believe”
Thou shalt not sing past winners’ songs, particularly songs of triumph that only work for overwrought winners who have that emotional edge. Come on, Syesha! Fantasia’s coronation song? The judges saw Fantasia sing it live, you dingbat! Her DNAis practically infused into that song; of course you’re going to suffer by comparison. Vocally, it started out ‘okay’ but she lost the key of the tune somewhere in the middle and hoped that one sorry glory note at the end would make us all forget. Unfortunately, I remember and if someone was going home this week, it would most likely be Syesha.
Jason Castro "Somewhere Over The Rainbow”
Best of the night for me. Simple, heartfelt, and unique. I’d take this over Kat McFake’s rendition any day of the week. This version was featured in “Meet Joe Black” and on an eToy commercial. I believe it’s on other soundtracks, but I can’t place them at this late hour. Anyone?
Kristy Lee Cook “Anyway”
Check for flying pigs! I actually like Kristy’s performance three weeks in a row! Martina McBride’s “Independence Day” would have been a better song choice and rendered itself to a more exciting performance ( and more votes!) but this was once again, a personal best for the Country Cookie. She just may be able to make enough money to buy that horse back!
David Cook “Innocent”
Okay, who are you and what have you done with D-Cook? He’s lucky I’m a big fan and therefore willing to give him my one “Get Out of Jail FREE” card. What an utter disappointment! I didn’t understand a single word until he switched to his upper register and it still just wasn’t good. We’re innocent… we get it. Could he have picked a shoddier song? At least he didn’t choose “Sympathy for the Devil”, right? I wonder who talked him into writing “Give Back” on his palm. Surely he didn’t do that on his own (wink, wink). Absolute worst of the night for me.
Carly Smithson “The Show Must Go On”
First of all, what is she wearing? An 80’s trucker chick “stopping by 7-Eleven for some Big Gulp and Beef Jerky” outfit? That getup was really, really bad… and yet it was still better than her performance. Ridiculously stupid song choice- would we or would we have not all melted if she had sang Sarah McLachlan’s “Arms of An Angel”? She has a beautiful voice and amazing range, but this performance just fell flat. Again, I chalk it up to insufficient time allotted to the performances during “Give Back” week.
David Archuleta “Angels”
Thanks American Idol, give Archie a reason to preach at us. I mean, what 17 year old boy doesn’t lie in bed at night thinking of angels? Okay, maybe Charlie’s Angels or more like the skankier Victoria’s angels! And what was with the girl holding the “Lick Those Lips” sign? Creep.EEE. His performance wasn’t as mangled as Jessica Simpson’s take, but still no where near as great as the original. Once again, David sounded like a frog having an asthma attack and he still managed to receive sumptuous praise. I crown him the Most Nasally Nasal that ever Nasalled! Nice piano playing though.
Brooke White “You’ve Got A Friend”
Cold and pitchy, but a beautiful, moving song nonetheless. At least she didn’t talk back during the judging, but she looked like she was going to start crying any minute. Once again, Brooke worked her frailty. She reminds me so much of Karen Carpenter, and not in a good way.
Unless you are new to Idol, you know that NO ONE goes home this week. They can’t do an entire show of love and compassion and then give someone the boot! But, they will tally up the votes from this week and next week, and if my memory serves me correctly, two people will gracefully exit next week. My bet is that Syesha will be one of them. She has the originality of a stick of gum and after she spent such a long time talking back to not one, but two judges, I’d say her days are numbered.